(left to right: Anthony Perrone, moi, Charlie Marsh, Christmas Eve early 80's B.L.)
I have accepted my cousin Anthony's apology that he sent me via e-mail, though a telephone call would have been more personal. The sorrow and hurt broke him and he unwisely let loose on me. I said not a word in reply. After long deliberation, I retaliated with words. Just words, right? I am a chicchierone, a big mouth. This is why my Mafia application was rejected. However, I told the truth. I told no lies. I stopped lying many years ago, to others and myself. At his request and for the sake of my aunt Celena's soul, I deleted the post that spoke about him, his spouse and sister in a less than favorable light. They knew what I had posted was true and couldn't bear to have it made public. But, I am not afraid to look any one in the eye, especially now with Lasik surgery. I will let it stand there. Niente!
Long ago at the darkest hour before the light, something awakened within me. I needed to heed my soul's call for authenticity. It hasn't been all cabaret and rose gardens, but I have seen, heard and felt beauty in the soul of the world. People who have not experienced this think it is all dramatic ego and staging. So much stronzata or cazzata. Enough is enough is enough. People either come together in some modicum of understanding and move on with the life or go their own separate ways and move on.
P.S. My aunt Celena's maiden name was Chiaradio. In Italian the words mean "bright light of God". Chiaroscuro is cognate. I recently learned that my mother's name was listed as "Lucia" rather than "Louise" on an old census report from the early 20th century. The truth was/is revealed to prophets, mystics and seers through light and the word. The objects of worship of the Hindus were devas, cognate with the Latin deus (god) derived from the old Sanskrit div, meaning brightness. I guess the bright ray has been dimmed almost to extinction by ignorance and greed along the way. And by the way, my aunt Celena's mother's maiden name was Angelina Perrone, my grandmother.
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